


asked myself for peace

by Loz



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, I do what I want, I'm writing fic about Joe Russo's cameo character, M/M, OT3, Other people are writing fix-it fics for their favourites, Post Decimation Aftermath, Reunited and It Feels So Good, Yes I named the cameo character after the person who played him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-05-13
Packaged: 2020-03-02 09:49:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18808708
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Loz/pseuds/Loz
Summary: Somehow, someway, Joe has made a new life with Afa. And then Dominic comes back.





	asked myself for peace

Joe’s humming along to the radio as he washes the dishes - some old Future Islands song is playing - when he hears the key in the lock. He pauses, frowns, glances over his shoulder. Afa went to work an hour ago and should still be at the office. A couple of buildings collapsed in the city center a month ago; lack of maintenance, structural oversight, and general disrepair. If there’s been an accident, Joe doesn’t know what he’ll do.

“Afa?” he calls, dries his hands hurriedly and steps into the hall. 

It isn’t Afa. 

Joe used to see him all the time, even though he knew conclusively he was gone, saw him blow away in the wind like a dust storm. But every time he’d walk down the street, or meander down a grocery store aisle, or go to a crowded plaza, just to feel like a pack animal again, he’d see him. Every auburn curl, a flash of brown irises, an economy of movement, a broad-shouldered lope. He’d turn a corner and Joe would rush, would try to follow, but he’d have disappeared. 

Dominic. 

Joe doesn’t know why his mind would conjure him up now, at this point in his life where he’s just beyond a new beginning. 

“What’s going on?” Dominic asks. He steps and reaches forward, brushes his fingers through Joe’s hair. “What’s happened to you?”

In that moment it’s clear that this is no apparition. 

“How?” Joe asks back. 

Steve – _Captain America_ – he’d led Joe’s support group, so Joe’d assumed that was it, there was no getting them back; the billions lost, the loves of their lives floating in the middle of the air. If someone that powerful, that important, was doing community work, was telling everyone they had to move on, that it was their duty to continue living, then that was it, wasn’t it? There was no deus ex machina, no flipping a switch, no retrieving that which was corrupted.

But here Dominic is, looking no older, looking _so confused_.

And Joe realizes the reason behind Dominic’s initial touch: his own hair is grayer. Shorter. Thinning out more at the front. He looks older than the five years that have passed. Everyone does.

Joe’s knees give out, turned to jelly. He crumbles to the ground. Dominic crouches down – concerned, horrified. 

“You were gone,” Joe says, his voice sounding small even to his own ears. “You were ashes.”

*

Joe tells Dominic about it all. Shows him the leaflets. The posters. The motivational TED talks. Dominic goes on a face journey that’s so expressive Joe ends up laughing so hard he cries. He hadn’t forgotten that Dominic wears every emotion in each twitch of his face, but the memory had dulled and softened. 

And then he tells him about Afa. His heart clenches in his chest with every word, with every glance they share.

“You love him,” Dominic says.

There can be no denial. “I think you will too,” Joe offers. 

It’s a lie. He doesn’t know if Dominic will even like him, but it’s something he hopes for, wishes – if he can be allowed such a thing when one of the dearest loves of his life has come back to him, arrived unbidden at this home they used to share. You’re not supposed to be able to go back home again, but he has, he’s here.

“He’s brought you happiness, so even if he’s an annoying little shit, I think you’re right.”

“He’s 6′4″.” 

The radio crackles and cuts in with breaking news about the billions of people returning. They turn on the TV and watch as more and more news reports come flooding in. Dominic isn’t an anomaly. 

*

Afa comes rushing through the door an hour later, uncharacteristically loud. “Did you hear?” he yells. “Joe, have you seen?”

He stops short in the living room doorway, gazes at Dominic. He lets out a long, low exhale, stalks forward and gathers Dominic into his arms, swings him around. Dominic mugs at Joe from Afa’s embrace, his expression a myriad of emotions. 

“It’s good to meet you, man, I’ve heard so much about you,” Afa says with a sob. He lets Dominic go, gathers Joe in for his own crushing clinch. “My mom’s making us all panipopo. We have to go!”

Joe gazes at Dominic. Dominic gazes at Joe. 

They end up pressed together on the L, needing to stand – which is a weird sensation in and of itself. it hasn’t been this crowded in years. Joe’s heart stutters. He used to hate this, way back when, would prefer to walk for miles than take public transport, even though everyone he knew said he was being a dick. But hearing people’s phone conversations, seeing the joy on people’s faces, being surrounded by such raw emotion – it settles something inside of him that was still convinced he was dreaming. It makes him feel alive.

Afa’s mom is just like him – warm and sweet and considerate. Joe always knew she would be, having reveled in Afa’s stories. She holds him close and whispers how happy she is Afa found him. Joe doesn’t know how to tell her he was the lucky one. Afa’s older sister Arihi has tear tracks down her cheeks as she tells the story of how she walked into the kitchen and bumped into her mom. The naked affection Joe feels as both Dominic and Afa take hold of her hands overwhelms him.

*

“I’ll stay with Arihi and mom tonight,” Afa says, later that evening, after they’re all full. They’re in the kitchen, tidying up, as the others continue to watch reunion stories. For once, the 24 hour news cycle is a blessing. “I can swing by tomorrow, start packing my things.”

“What? Why?”

“You have Dominic,” Afa says, like it’s simple, like it’s fair. 

“But I have you too, don’t I?” Joe asks, his stomach twisting into knots. “I mean, i know how that sounds, like I’m greedy as hell, but… I can’t stop loving you on the turn of a dime.”

“How do you think it’ll work?”

“I have no idea, but I think we should at least try. If you think you can.”

“What will Dominic say?”

“I’ll say what’s the worst that can happen?” Dominic says as he leans against the doorjamb. He’s always loved grand entrances.

*

For the first few weeks, Joe carefully watches as Dominic and Afa learn one another. They’re very different people. 

Dominic’s got a flair for drama, likes to exaggerate in all things, and he tends to live life like he’s either constantly on a high wire or about to stumble over a trip wire. It’s always excited Joe, who constantly needed to be pushed to the edges of his comfort zone when he was younger. Afa, on the other hand, is calm and collected almost always. He’s gentle and relaxed. He lives life like it’s something to be savored, enjoyed from every angle. It’s always made Joe feel safe and secure, in a world that became so lacking in stability, in surety.

There are some disagreements, but they’re easily settled. There are some awkward situations, where no one knows what the protocol could or should be. There are shared looks and rolled eyes at different moments as the weeks go by, and Joe quickly discovers that he’s the cause of them. It seems, even more than their desire to get along for Joe’s sake, they get along in their joint mockery and despair of his foolish ways. It’s a start.

Joe alternates nights with Afa and Dominic, and he thinks he has love enough to spare for both of them, but he worries about it all the same. What if it’s not enough? What if _he’s_ not enough? It was different, when Dominic was gone. The love he felt was ever-present, but it was relegated to another part of him, to sense-memory and a phantom heart. Now that he’s made flesh, everything Joe feels for him rushes to the surface. This then feels like a betrayal to Afa, who collected him when he started to crumble, and mended him until he was mostly whole. There are entire days Joe feels conflicted. 

But this much he knows; he’s in love with every touch of Afa’s hand and every sweep of Dominic’s fingers. He’s in love with their warm, fond smiles and shared in-jokes, and well-worn arguments. He’s in love. 

*

One night, they try to share the bed. It doesn’t work because double beds aren’t made for three grown men. They buy a king and have an adventure the next week getting it into their small-doorway-having traditional-style Brownstone. 

This experiment goes much better.

*

It’s three months later when Joe walks in on them kissing. They spring apart as if caught in something scandalous, but Joe sits on the couch and asks them to continue, watches avidly. He can’t deny that a part of him, a tiny dark-voiced part, is a little worried. Maybe he’s superfluous to requirements. Maybe he was only ever supposed to be a fulcrum, but now they’re balanced without him. After all, they hid this. That feels significant.

But he quashes that voice a second later when they drag him between them and kiss him from toe to tip.

Joe hadn’t giggled since he was ten, but he giggles now.

And he thinks that he can have this. He can hold onto these people that he loves without fear. He can be who he wants, with who he wants to be with. He can be part of this new world, where love can conquer and good can triumph. And the pain he felt to get here is a distant memory, scattered on the breeze.


End file.
